Interview with Jeff Greenwald, MFT, Author of ‘The Mental Edge for Young Athletes’

An interview about The Mental Edge for Young Athletes by Jeff Greenwald, presented by The Children’s Book Review.

Jeff Greenwald talks with us about The Mental Edge for Young Athletes, opening up about the mastery mindset, managing fear, and the role parents play in shaping an athlete’s mental game.

With the insight of both a former Division 1 athlete and a seasoned sports psychologist, Jeff Greenwald approaches the mental side of competition with rare authenticity. In The Mental Edge for Young Athletes, he weaves together personal turning points, the struggles of icons like Michael Jordan and Simone Biles, and the everyday challenges of kids learning to manage pressure, disappointment, and fear.

In our conversation, Greenwald reflects on the disqualification that changed his own path, why shifting from outcome-driven goals to a “mastery mindset” is transformative, and how parents can strike the delicate balance between support and over-involvement. What emerges is not just a guide for athletic success, but a blueprint for resilience, joy, and confidence that extends far beyond sports.

In The Mental Edge for Young Athletes, you recount a pivotal moment from your youth when you were banned from competition, a story that has since become a cornerstone of your philosophy on mental toughness. How did this transformative experience shape your understanding of resilience and mental strength?

Jeff Greenwald (JG): When I was banned at the Nick Bollettieri IMG Academy after being disqualified by the ref, it was a shock — a wake-up call. I was out of control. Not because I was smashing rackets, but because I was reactive and explosive inside. I yelled, maybe slammed my racket against a fence, and let the frustration of mistakes take over. My parents wanted the best for me, but they never set real limits. That disqualification was the first time someone put a concrete boundary around behavior I couldn’t manage in the moment.

The truth was, I had no tools. When I missed a shot I thought I shouldn’t miss, it felt like evidence that today was “my bad day” and that I was doomed to lose. My emotions hijacked me. And like most athletes, once you’re triggered, it happens so fast that reason doesn’t stand a chance against raw emotion.

That’s why I now teach athletes about the “remote control” in your brain. When something unexpected happens, you need to be able to change the channel — to toggle into acceptance, to refocus on the next point, to reset posture and composure. There are dozens of ways to do this, and in my book I outline 27 chapters for athletes and 5 for parents. The point isn’t that you need them all, but that every athlete can find a few tools that fit. Once you use them, you start to believe you can manage yourself in the heat of battle. That’s true confidence — what I call unconditional confidence.

The book advocates for the development of a “mastery mindset” over fixating on outcomes. How do you reassure competitive athletes and their parents that this shift is not only beneficial but also practical in the pursuit of excellence?

(JG): Shifting from an outcome mindset to a mastery mindset is one of the most important—and most difficult—changes an athlete can make. Fixating on winning or losing fuels uncertainty and anxiety. But when you learn to frame that uncertainty as anticipation, as excitement, you start to see it for what it really is: the essence of sports. The unknown is what makes competition compelling, fun, and challenging.

Within that reality, the athlete’s job is to anchor themselves in perspective and specific intentions: What do I want to emphasize today? What do I want to prioritize in my performance? Mastery isn’t just an intellectual idea—it’s process, growth, and the daily challenge of pushing yourself forward.

But here’s the truth: athletes and parents usually don’t fully buy in until the outcome-driven approach stops working. They’ve gone down the path of “what ifs,” “shoulds,” expectations, and potential, only to find it creates misery. The joy disappears, replaced by dread. Parents start fearing their child’s meltdowns, and coaches can sometimes unintentionally fuel the stress.

So the real shift doesn’t come from me “convincing” families that mastery is better. It comes from connecting with them—listening, empathizing, showing that I understand exactly what they’re going through. Once they feel understood, they’re more willing to try new tools, experiment with new principles, and commit to a different process.

That’s where the collaboration begins. Families test the tools. Athletes reflect on how they feel and perform. Parents notice changes in their child’s attitude and resilience. And slowly, they see the results—more calm, more joy, and yes, better performance and more wins.

The convincing happens naturally. Once people experience the shift for themselves, the process speaks louder than any explanation. With consistency, the mastery mindset almost always leads to progress. Families who commit to it see improvement not only in results, but in the way their kids experience the sport—and that’s where the real transformation happens.

You use real-life examples from athletes like Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant, and Simone Biles. How do you decipher which stories resonate most with teens?

(JG): There are countless examples at the highest levels of sport that reveal the truth about failure and resilience. Michael Jordan famously said he missed over 9,000 shots in his career and lost nearly 300 games—and that it was because of those failures that he succeeded. His competitiveness, work ethic, and discipline made him legendary, but his willingness to fail, again and again, is what truly set him apart.

Kobe Bryant carried that same spirit. He was relentless in his persistence and often spoke about meditation, resilience, and staying in the moment. Simone Biles, in a different but equally powerful way, showed the world that vulnerability is part of greatness. By stepping back from the Olympics to protect her mental health, then returning stronger, she modeled courage and self-awareness at the highest stage.

Stories like these matter because they validate athletes’ lived experience. They show that even the best struggle. Success doesn’t come in spite of failure or adversity—it comes because of it. That message normalizes what kids go through: missing shots, getting eye rolls from teammates, hearing criticism from coaches, feeling overwhelmed in the moment. Those are the times when emotions hijack the brain, when everything feels magnified. That’s exactly when they need tools—a “remote control” to reset, refocus, and move forward.

At the same time, it’s important to break through the myth of perfection and the social media highlight reels that glorify heroic last-second shots or miracle plays. The truth is, even Roger Federer once shanked a match point. In tennis, if you win just 55% of points, you’re number one in the world. In baseball, a .300 average—three hits out of ten—lands you in the Hall of Fame. In the Olympics, a tenth of a second can separate gold from silver.

These numbers reframe the conversation. They remind athletes that mistakes and setbacks are not proof of failure—they’re built into the game. And when parents and coaches model this perspective, kids start to internalize it. Over time, they stop fearing mistakes and start embracing the process that leads to real growth, resilience, and joy in their sport.

Fear—of losing, mistakes, or judgment—is described as the number one mental barrier, yet many of your principles like “giving yourself permission to miss” go against the perfectionism often instilled in sports. What’s the most effective first step an athlete can take to break through this fear, and what resistance do you encounter when introducing these anti-perfectionism ideas?

(JG): So much of what kids see in sports today is wrapped around those big, heroic moments—the walk-off home run, the goal in the final seconds, the fifth-set tiebreaker at Wimbledon. Social media amplifies the celebration of those snapshots, and kids end up thinking that’s the standard: don’t miss, be perfect, deliver when everything is on the line. But that lens—this obsession with outcomes—distorts reality.

Here’s the reality: the data tells a different story. In tennis, if you win just 55% of the points, you’re number one in the world. In baseball, hitting three out of ten times makes you a Hall of Famer. At the Olympics, a tenth of a second can separate gold from silver. These numbers remind us that success in sports is not about perfection—it’s about margins, resilience, and stacking small wins.

This is why I stop athletes when they beat themselves up after mistakes. I remind them that failure is built into the very fabric of sport. The real growth happens when they can reflect: What were my intentions going in? Did I reset when I got off track? Did I stay committed to my routines? Did I find a way to release tension in the hardest moments? That reflection—learning from the misses—is what builds mastery.

Parents and coaches play a huge role here. When a child has a bad game, the message can’t be “you missed.” The best coaches and parents keep the focus on effort, skill development, and character. They model consistency. They normalize mistakes. They help kids understand that while today’s loss may feel like the world is caving in, it’s not permanent, and they will recover. That consistency of message—“what did you learn, and how will you apply it?”—is what sinks in over time.

And yes, it’s equally important for athletes to believe in the possibility of winning. But “possibility” is different from certainty. You don’t know if you will win. What you do know is that mistakes are part of the journey, and that every game is another chance to use your tools, reset, and grow. That’s the shift—from being hijacked by fear of failure to being grounded in process and possibility.

You write with both athletes and parents in mind. What’s the biggest mistake well-meaning parents make when it comes to their child’s mental game?

(JG): One of the biggest mistakes well-meaning parents make with their kids in sports is falling into the trap of being too involved. It comes from a natural and very human place—you want to help your child, protect them when they fail, soothe them when they’re upset, and motivate them when they’re not doing what they “should” be doing. But too much involvement often backfires.

Here’s why: kids start to feel like you care more about their performance than they do. They pick up on your eagerness, your enthusiasm, and your urgency, and that can create extra pressure and anxiety. Instead of feeling supported, they feel watched, evaluated, and sometimes even smothered. Over time, this can drain their motivation because it stops being about their drive and becomes about yours.

The key is learning to step back. Less is more. Parenting here is about timing, light touches, and planting seeds rather than constant correction or commentary. I sometimes call it “drop and roll”—slipping in a small, useful idea when they least expect it, then rolling out without hovering. For example, you might casually mention, “That’s why having a reset button helps,” or “Every athlete feels nerves—you just learn to manage them.” You’re not lecturing; you’re modeling perspective and planting ideas.

This doesn’t mean parents should be uninvolved. That’s a misperception. Research shows kids thrive when they experience both high expectations and high support. Believing in your child’s ability to improve is powerful, but it has to be balanced with unconditional support—support that doesn’t change whether they win, lose, or struggle.

Where it goes wrong is the degree of involvement. Getting in the weeds about missed jump rope sessions, extra workouts, or constant reminders to study creates tension and actually undermines growth. That’s what coaches are for. Parents’ role is to scaffold—to provide encouragement, perspective, and stability—while also giving kids the autonomy to take ownership of their development. That’s how they build pride, resilience, and independence.

What are the most concerning digital-age pressures you’re seeing young athletes face today that didn’t exist even 10 years ago?

(JG): With such constant exposure to social media, athletes are faced with a plethora of content that glorifies professional sports and offers unlimited instruction about how to be better. On one hand, access to information can be helpful and inspiring when used in moderation and based on athletes’ individual needs, but it can also add pressure through relentless comparison, emphasis on outcome, creating an even greater fear of failure. My book teaches principles that build confidence and inspire athletes and families to choose the most productive path forward while letting go of the stress and unrealistic expectations that emerge from excessive social media use. 

In the age of TikTok and instant gratification, what strategies do you recommend to keep young athletes engaged in building long-term mental skills?

(JG): The key is to make mental training both simple and tangible. Big ideas like “mastery” have to be broken down into very specific, actionable tools. Athletes need clear ways to track progress—through reflection, journaling, or writing down weekly intentions—so they can actually see the connection between their mindset, their learning, their performance, and eventually, their results. Once they recognize that link, it creates an upward spiral of motivation.

Boundaries around technology are also crucial. Social media and phones eat away at focus, attention span, and recovery time. I recommend setting clear limits—no phones at practice, and intentional downtime outside of competition. Just as importantly, we need to have direct conversations with athletes about how technology impacts performance. Show them data, yes, but also let them experience the difference: have them notice how they feel competing after scrolling endlessly versus when they come in fresh. That contrast is often the most powerful teacher.

On the field or court, focusing tools are essential. Short, on-the-go resets—like a breath routine, a physical cue, or a reset phrase—help athletes redirect their attention in real time. Mindfulness is another critical piece: teaching athletes to drop out of their head and back into their body. Something as simple as feeling their feet on the ground, noticing their breath, or connecting to the ball in their hand creates a tactile anchor that calms nerves and sharpens focus.

Finally, it comes down to consistency. Families and coaches who model these practices and keep reinforcing them help athletes see mental training as part of the sport itself, not an optional extra. Over time, this approach not only improves performance but also restores a sense of joy and ownership—something that can easily get lost in today’s fast-paced, comparison-driven culture.

How do you help young athletes maintain focus under pressure when they know their performance might be filmed, posted, and critiqued online within hours?

(JG): This added pressure is now built into our culture. Social media has only increased the level of anxiety athletes feel today. Ten years ago, and certainly two decades ago, it wasn’t as difficult to move athletes toward a mindset of mastery and to achieve the depth of focus required to excel in competitive sports. It just takes more consistent work, awareness, and a commitment from young athletes to train this level of focus. I see it now as giving them another channel to get consumed in, which is why I use the analogy of giving them a remote control. We can’t stop them from engaging in social media, but we can give them options. Those athletes who care enough about performance and winning, will learn how to focus and self-regulate as the best athletes do, so they can change the channel when they need to.

The book is complemented by a hands-on workbook, a tool designed to engage readers in the application of the principles actively. How does this interactive approach deepen the impact of the book, compared to a passive reading experience?

(JG): Encouraging young athletes to reflect is essential—more than ever. The workbook helps athletes go deeper. Athletes—and parents, too—need built-in opportunities to pause and ask as their attention spans shrink: How did that go? What did I do well? What do I want to do differently next time? For athletes, this also means checking in on the intentions they set going into a game, match, or meet. Did they stick with them, or did those intentions disappear under pressure? That awareness is where growth begins.

Parents play a huge role here as well. They need to understand their impact. Kids read every expression and tone—when a parent is pacing, yelling instructions, or simply looking anxious on the sideline, kids pick it up instantly. Sometimes the most powerful support is quiet, steady presence.

That’s why having a process matters. The workbook to make this reflection tangible. Each week, athletes can answer questions, set intentions for the next competition, and write them down. Journaling, even just a few sentences, slows them down in a world that’s constantly speeding them up. Social media and technology push kids into passively consuming information—watching, scrolling, comparing—rather than actively engaging with their own development.

Many young athletes also don’t yet have a strong sense of identity; they’re told what to do all day by parents, teachers, and coaches. Reflection and intention-setting help them reclaim some ownership. When athletes have a written plan or goals in their bag, something they can refer back to during the week, it builds accountability and consistency. Over time, they see that the mental game is not an “extra,” but a core part of performance—one that leads directly to better results, stronger confidence, and deeper resilience.

You competed as a Division 1 and professional tennis player. Looking back, which mental skill from your book would have most changed your own career?

There are really three things that would have been transformative:

1. The Mastery Mindset.

If I had understood earlier that being absorbed in specific cues and clear intentions overrides the obsession with outcomes, it would have changed everything. Instead of being consumed by frustration, expectations, or results—things outside my control—I could have grounded myself in the process. That shift in mindset is powerful: mastery over outcomes.

2. The Skill of Focus.

Equally important is knowing how to focus. Focus isn’t just “concentrating harder”—it has different dimensions. You literally have to coach your brain. If I had known how to catch myself drifting, how to refocus on what was relevant, and how to “change the channel” in real time, I would have competed with far more consistency. That skill alone reduces anxiety because even if you’re distracted or things are going poorly, you know you can always bring yourself back to the present.

3. Permission to Miss.

This goes hand-in-hand with mastery. One error—or even several—doesn’t define the outcome. Giving yourself permission to miss removes the fear of failure. It frees you to keep competing, to make adjustments, and to stay in the fight even when things look bleak. You start playing for something bigger than a single point or possession.

Together, these principles—mastery, focus, and permission to miss—would have been game changers for me.

If you could boil the book’s message down to one sentence for a young athlete feeling defeated after a loss, what would you say?

It’s okay to feel the sting. It’s okay to be disappointed, even angry. You poured time, energy, and heart into this, and it didn’t go your way. Those feelings are real—and they deserve to be validated, not brushed aside. Too often, well-meaning parents rush to talk kids out of their emotions: “But you played well… but you learned so much…” Meanwhile, the athlete is still hurting. In that moment, the loss feels bigger than any silver lining. So the first step is simple: let them feel. Paradoxically, when kids are given permission to sit with those emotions, they usually move through them faster.

Then comes the opportunity. A loss is a challenge—but it’s also a gift if you let it sharpen your awareness. Reflection is the bridge: What happened? Where was my focus? What was my mindset? What do I want to carry forward into the next game? When athletes can crystallize a loss into one or two specific adjustments, it transforms the experience from failure into fuel.

And here’s the crucial point: a bad game does not define what comes next. It’s not the loss itself, but the response to the loss, that shapes the future. That’s where the mastery mindset comes in—the perspective that sees every experience, win or lose, as part of the long game.

When families anchor themselves in mastery, setbacks stop feeling like the end of the world. They become part of the process. That steadiness allows kids to weather the ups and downs, stay connected to the deeper joy of their sport, and keep building toward something far more lasting than a single score or result.

About the Book

Publisher’s Book Summary: The Mental Edge for Young Athletes is a practical, one-of-a-kind guide for athletes and their parents (includes a powerful parent guide) written by two-time world champion and elite mental coach Jeff Greenwald, MFT. A licensed psychotherapist with over 25 years of experience helping youth athletes and their families, Jeff shares real-world, proven tools to build confidence, manage performance anxiety, improve family dynamics, and reinforce your child’s new mental and emotional skills.

Through short, easy-to-read chapters, this guide brings real conversations with young athletes to life—along with inspiring stories and mindset strategies used by the world’s top competitors. Kids will learn how to bounce back from mistakes, stay focused under pressure, and compete with greater motivation, clarity, and resilience. There is also a parent’s guide with Jeff’s top recommendations on how you can successfully navigate the most challenging moments we face with our young athletes.

While many mental training books for kids offer surface-level advice or rigid checklists, The Mental Edge for Young Athletes goes deeper. It bridges the gap between theory and real-world application—bringing to life the mindset tools used by elite performers in a way that young athletes (and their parents) can truly relate to. With real stories, actionable techniques, and a compassionate voice, this book offers what most guides miss: authenticity, relevance, and lasting impact.

Whether you’re a parent supporting your child, a coach guiding your team, or a young athlete striving to succeed, this book will become an essential companion in both sport and life.

Buy the Book

About the Author

Jeff Greenwald, MFT, is a world champion athlete, licensed psychotherapist, best-selling author, and one of the world’s leading mental coaches for athletes. With over 25 years of experience helping youth, college, and professional competitors thrive under pressure, Jeff brings a rare blend of elite performance insight and clinical expertise to his work.

He is the author of the international bestseller The Best Tennis of Your Life, which has sold over 75,000 copies worldwide, and the new book The Mental Edge for Young Athletes—a groundbreaking guide for building confidence, emotional resilience, and a stronger mindset in sports and life.

Jeff has worked with athletes across every major sport and consulted for national teams, Fortune 500 leaders, top junior academies, and competitive athletes at all levels of sport. He is a two-time ITF World Champion and was inducted into the Northern California Tennis Hall of Fame in 2019 for his contribution in the field of sports psychology and success as a world-ranked tennis player.

Through his writing, coaching, and speaking, Jeff empowers athletes and their families to navigate the mental game with clarity, courage, and lasting confidence.

To learn more, visit mentaledgeforsports.com.

This interview—Interview with Jeff Greenwald, MFT, Author of ‘The Mental Edge for Young Athletes’—was conducted between Jeff Greenwald and Bianca Schulze.